Keyshia Ka'oir's hard work, loyalty and 1 to 3 return on a $2 million investment is rewarded on a BET platform for the World to see. #issawedding But it's funny to me how men are using this example to justify their poor decision making and encourage their women to stick it out with them since it is "hard out here."
But for you regular schmegulars, if you think you're going to get away with cheating, having a drug addiction, serving jail time amongst other things, without having been all in or not investing from jump, I gotta tell you: "It's not happening for YOU. You're Not Gucci!" Besides, there is a better way to live, that's the bottom line is this love story.
Practical Advice in Emulating the Best Rapper Alive
Too often, the every day man is mirroring the hottest rapper alive--Jay Z or some other rapper's story. But this is in error. Your story is your own. Your path has been pre-designed for you to learn your purpose. Your learning modules, your daily lessons, are tailored to your life's purpose! Emulating someone's else's process or success (the end product) is in error. So instead of believing that you can do what these men have done (lying, cheating, consuming illegal substances) and get away with it. See these examples and let their stories dissuade you from making poor choices and inspire you to be better.
Can Women Change Men?
Some might say that Keyshia Ka'oir "changed" Gucci Mane. Hmm ... I beg to differ. I believe that she was rewarded with her investment for having withstood the embarrassment and endured the bad times, which Gucci admits. But how many of you are rewarding your woman for sticking it out with you during your hard times? How long should a woman stick around before you reward her? Or should she stick it out, endure, without knowing how things will turn out ... hopeful of all things ... meanwhile you expose her to hurt, harm and danger? Nah ... men need to check other men and encourage one another to be better to themselves and their significant others.
On another point, I don't believe women can change men. Men choose to change. It is a conscious decision that they would need to make. A man can be motivated by a woman's labor of love. A man can feel that a woman's love is incentive enough for him to change. But without a man deciding to change, it isn't happening. So my advice is not to stick around unless you are witnessing that he's changing markedly. Otherwise, what are you sticking it out for, Sis? The hurt, harm, and danger.
Time Served ... Together
Also, if one of us is doing time, so should the other. See my perspective below.
Fellas, if you have a woman who is in school, how are you going to show your progress while she's serving time to attain her educational goals? Black women are earning more degrees than black men. How can we use this information to leverage success in our romantic relationships? When women are investing in themselves, in their future, men should be doing 2 things: 1) Anything to lighten her load and 2) Investing in yourself, so that when she walks across that stage on graduation day, there's actually a ROI awaiting you both at the house. That's a good two years ... four years, at best, time where you both can PRODUCE and SUCCEED.
Also, if you're not exactly an initiator, a self-starter, there's nothing wrong with asking your woman to strategize, so you can establish some footing. After all, you're a team! No one has to know how your relationship operates, so you won't be openly criticized for what or who motivates your moves. That is, if your concern is your ego.
When compared to Gucci and Keyshia, Gucci served time, and she invested her time into their future. Do you see where this is going? How are you and your mate mapping your success story today? Have you written down your goals and reversed engineered the process to achieve them? How will you serve time in one another, in yourselves, for the next 4 years?
As for me, I believe love is great. It is a wonderful thing, but when love is coupled with two persons who have a willingness to invest, cultivate, and wait until harvest, the ULTIMATE LOVE STORY is of consequece. If you can build a family, you can sustain a corporation, but it starts with a partnership.